I love to encourage moms. It blesses me to see so many women striving to be what they need to be for their children. Our world needs this.
As a young mom, I felt insufficient at times. In my mind the world was watching to see if I got it right. Light-hearted and well-meaning jokes about my housekeeping or parenting shortcomings hurt deeply as they joined in my heart with my own self-criticism. Since then I’ve grown to embrace my weaknesses as opportunities for God to show His strength.
Most of the time we are our own worst critics. We just want to be good moms.
But what does a good mom look like?
Good moms have messy hair and wear their pajamas to drop their kids off at school late because they were helping their child recover from a morning melt-down.
Good moms get up, put on their makeup, and get dressed for work even though they’re exhausted because they know their families rely on them.
Good moms sacrifice an income to make a home for their families.
Good moms put off opportunities in order to meet the needs of their children at home.
Good moms take opportunities and live as examples to their children to always learn and develop throughout life.
Good moms wear snot and spit up on their shoulders like it’s jewelry at church.
Good moms cringe when the Jehovah’s Witnesses come to the door – not because they don’t enjoy the visit, but because they’re ashamed of being seen wearing pajamas without a bra at noon.
Good moms feel guilty whether they take a day off to be with their sick child or not. Either way they feel guilty of something to somebody somewhere.
Good moms work hard in their careers to provide for their kids.
Good moms work hard in their homes without pay to provide for their kids.
Good moms are short, tall, skinny, fat, plain, fancy, at home, at the office, married, unmarried, barely scraping by, wealthy… and variances in between.
We all struggle with being a “good mom” and we all fall short. We all feel like we’re not quite what we should be.
There are bad moms out there. But if you’re struggling to be a good mom, then you’re not one of those bad moms.
Here’s the truth about good moms:
The struggle is an indicator of your growth and hard work.
The exhaustion reveals that you give physically and emotionally beyond what you have within you to give.
The guilt is a result of having high expectations for yourself.
We feel insufficient because we can’t control of the outcome of our efforts. If we could work hard enough to ensure our kids would turn out OK, we’d willingly work ourselves to death. But there are no guarantees.
And so, our best efforts are good enough. God will do the rest. The holes we leave behind are His to fill. And quite frankly, there comes a time when those holes are not our business anymore, and we must continually surrender them to God in prayer.
The truth is that God has our backs. Keep doing your thing, good moms.